(Aren't my kid's feet cute?)

Just to let you all know, if you have not notice, I also use my blog spot as a journal for Samuel's reflex issues as well ;-)

So, today we are going to start mixing breast milk and formula together to see if we still get a happy baby. A couple of people suggested this to help ease Samuel back onto breast milk and to stretch the formula out a bit more to make sure he gets the least amount of dairy (if any is left in my system). We are going to try this for the next four days and I am hoping on Sunday evening he will have his first whole bottle of breast milk! 

Samuel has a doctors appointment on Tuesday and I hope I can report that his is back on breast milk and doing great! Also hoping my little guy is back on his growth chart! And have not gained too much weight since being on formula.  

I am so looking forward to not pumping as much! It really is a pain... have I complained about the pump in the last couple of blog posts? Ha ha ha. 

So far he had 3 ounces of breast milk and is still a happy camper. One of those ounces I gave to him without formula and he just closed his eyes as if to say: " This is the life". Glad he still has a thing for Momma's milk! 

One thing I hate about formula is the smelly baby poo's and farts! Breast milk fed babies usually don't have too smelly of poo/farts. Samuel has cleared the room many times since being on formula. Plus I really don't like the smell of formula either! Breast milk has a sweet smell to it formula has this weird dental smell to it. 
So that is the plan for now. Hoping it will work! Wish us luck?
It has been almost a week since we started the formula and let me tell you... Samuel has been a much happier baby! Today he did not scream once in pain! Our ears are also much happier since he is screaming less! Now all he does is a normal baby cry. The end of this week we are going to try breast milk again, I have been super diligent with my diet, I so hope it paid off! I am super excited to get him on breast milk again because life with formula has not been easy at all... plus I hate washing bottles! 

Like the Wii version of our son? (pokes above picture), that was when he was two weeks old! He now weighs around 12lbs. 

I am a milk making machine! I keep having this horrible nightmare that my milk will dry up but I did inventory on my freezer stash and I have over 80 ounces of milk in there! In a day and a half I pumped 36 ounces! Much better than 14 ounces a day so my pumping has been paying off. I am sure Samuel will love the fact that he gets more milk per nursing session.

Samuel is still spiting/throwing up still but not as often as he use to. I know this will never go away but the amount he was throwing up was crazy!! Poor little guy!

Today was his best day yet. He slept peacefully in his swing for a couple of hours then we played the rest of the day. I was glad it was a calm day because Matthew was off cutting wood so it was just Samuel and I for the day. 

Last week was pretty boring, just me taking care of Samuel. I am hoping once he gets bigger I will be more adventurous and go and do things with him. I think once we figure out this feeding issue we shall do it! 
A lot of people keep on asking if I miss being pregnant.... There are somethings I do miss, those sweet kicks, my belly occasionally... But, I am so glad not to be pregnant anymore! I love having my body back, I love that Samuel is here on the outside! I also love to be able to look down and see my toes again! 

When I was pregnant I had nightmares every night and so far (knock on wood) I have not had any bad dreams since Samuel has been born! The nightmares were so bad I woke up a couple of times crying! I also don't miss sleeping on my side with a body pillow! Matthew and I have so much more space on the bed since we put up the big old body pillow! I am sure if Matthew ever goes away, I shall use the body pillow to cuddle with... or just bring Samuel in the bed with me (because everyone knows Samuel will not go anywhere without his Mummy! ;-)  )

Another question people ask us if we want more kids in the future, I know I want more, Matthew wanted more before Samuel came, but now, not so sure ha ha ha! I have time to convince him that he wants more kids and this newborn phrase will sadly only last a little while. I know Matthew is afraid that he will hurt Samuel because he is so tiny but in a year or two I can see them both rough housing and rolling on the floor together!

The last question people wonder if we had any gender disappointments. We had none! I so wanted a boy and Matthew wanted a boy to be the eldest, to take care of his younger siblings. I knew Samuel was a boy from the moment I first saw him as a 10 week fetus! If we end up with all boys, I would be a happy Momma! But, if we do end up with a few girls I would be just as happy! If I could magically choose the amount of boys and the amount of girls we could have, I would choose three boys and a girl. The girl being the second youngest. I am scared to think of what might happen if we end up with Samuel and three girls! Ha ha ha! Just kidding, I am sure we would be very please with whatever God gives us! For now, we feel very blessed to have this little boy in our lives and call him our own!

Well, that is it for now! Ta ta! 
Cannot believe it has been two months since our baby boy has entered our lives! I could have sworn that I was just writing about being pregnant?! These last two months have been crazy! Both good and bad. Matthew and I are getting use to less sleep even though Samuel has been sleeping from 11pm-ish to 4:30 am-ish. I add the "ish" because as anyone knows babies tend to be all over the place with their sleeping schedule. He usually hits/misses these times by 30mins! 

I have been trying to come up with nicknames for Samuel. I usually call him Samuel-san. I blame hours of reading Manga for this nickname! I also tend to call him bud because he is just a bud trying to grow up. Matthew sometimes calls him Muel, like Emanuel but without the E.. Another nickname of his is Monkey because he has a ton... and I mean a ton of monkey stuff! I have no idea where all this monkey stuff came from, I never said.... I want him to have monkey but people just gave us monkey stuff! Which I do not mind one bit because being year of the monkey I tend to be fond of those little critters!
This post is going to be a bit picture heavy! I have not written a blog post in forever so thought to catch up on it!

Samuel got his two month shots last week. To say that I was a nervous wreck was an understatement! I almost cried leading up to the shots! I felt like I was giving them to him! I knew they are needed because of different illnesses so I just kept calm and held him as he got three shots and a drink. He loved the drink! Slurped it right down! The nurse said he would spit it out but he made sure not to spill a drop! Then came the three shots! She was super fast with them and he cried for a minuet then settle right down! I nursed him afterwards to help with the pain. The sweet nurse gave him a rattle that fits perfectly in his hand! He was super excited to have it and carried it out of the clinic then fell asleep with it!  
Bless his little heart! The next couple of days were no fun... he ran a low grade fever and was fussy. He got the shots on Tuesday (His two month birthday) and he was not himself again till Saturday. 

His reflex has gotten really bad... :(   (Super sad face!). He just screams in pain all day. We took him back to the doctors (because he lost weight within a couple of days) to do a weight check and talk about his reflex. The plan is to feed him some super hypoallergenic formula, in the mean time, I get rid of dairy out of my system so I can feed him breast milk again. I hate giving him formula but I also hate him being in pain! It makes me cry! Hopefully this will help him and we don't have to see a GI doctor. 

I have to say pumping every three hours, preparing formula and putting him down while I pump has not been easy! But I am just going to do this for two weeks then he will go back to breast milk! 

To say I am excited to nurse him again is an understatement! I have a calendar up and I am putting X's on the days that we have been on Formula. 

The first bottle of formula I had my mom give it to him while pumped/cried. Oh I hate pumping with a passion! I so give momma's who pumped the whole time a ton of credit! Plus bonus points! I don't know how they do it with other kids running around! 

I hate pumping so much I have a plan to stop diary when I am 7 months pregnant with our next little one so I don't have to do formula while dairy leaves my system.

Our Lactation Consultant, Terri, will help us to get him back to nurses when our two week trial is up. 

We started going to a new church, we got all dressed up, which has been a long time since I did, Matthew has worn his suit a couple of times since Samuel has been born. We all match! I match Samuel with his Daddy's dress shirt and my dress matched his jacket/pants. Samuel had a matching black diaper on but he got that dirty before we could take a picture. Hey, I know the diaper was a bit much but it was the first time we all matched!
Aren't we cute? :)

Some not baby news:

Like I said, we started to go to a new church, it has a cry room which is awesome for Samuel and I. It is almost like watching TV when we are in there. Only gone to the church once. I met a sweet lady who had a 3 month old name Rowen! Loved his name and he was a cutie pie. It was nice chatting with her.

Matthew and I are looking to move to Georgetown. Hopefully we stay there until Matthew is done with schooling. 

Matthew is still working a lot. Most days he does not come home till after 6:30 and he is gone by 5am the next day. I miss him and his helpfulness. Two nights during the week he has school so that means he is gone till 11 at night! Gah! These days I feel like a single parent      :(

My running has been going great! I was running a two miler at 30 mins now I am down to 23 mins! First mile I can run in 10 mins easily, second mile is the hard one and of course it does not help that the road we run on is super hilly!

I am going to try and start playing the piano again. I can only practice 3 times a week before or after we go running., We do not own a piano so using the parent. If I get good I shall post a video of me playing one of my favorite songs!! And maybe Benny ( my cousin, the one in the swimming pool) or I singing while I play ;-)

Matthew's and I favorite show is back on! We are HUGE Doctor Who fans!! We are so far still trying to figure out the theme for season 7. We think it has to do with the Doctor becoming more violent. We are so enjoying it being back on!

Well, I should go so this is not a super long post plus Samuel-san is up!
(Cake made by Matthew)

I've been craving cake so Matthew made me a super yummy cake! I sometimes feel like I am still pregnant because I get these food craving like I did when I was pregnant! 

Samuel is almost two months old (already!) and it seems like he has always meant to be in our lives. He was one of the pieces missing from our lives! Has the time gone by quickly these last two months? As the saying goes.... the year was short but the days are long! Oh we had some long days but I would not trade those two months for anything!

Samuel has indeed turn our lives upside down since he has been born. I feel like he has also taken over our house! There is not a room in our house that does not have a piece of Samuel in it. 
And yes I know the dishwasher is not a room but it was the only spot that was lit up at the moment! Samuel was sleeping and we had all the lights out.

So our little guy has been sleeping from 10:30pm (more closer to 11pm) to 4:30am! Go Samuel go! 
Matthew took this picture while Samuel and I were taking a nap. I love to cuddle with this guy! Almost as much as cuddling with Matthew. 

I have to go but I shall leave  you with this super cute picture of someone(s) else cuddling!
Why cannot I not be a Mom and still go towards my dreams?

Why should I not try and work harder so my little Samuel will see me as a great, successful person and not someone who did nothing with their life?

I want it all....

I want to be a runner and run marathons! I love running, it is one of my many passions. Why cannot I not be a mother and a runner?

I want it all.

I want to be a photographer. I want to freeze a life moment forever and be able to re-live that moment every time I look at that picture.

I want it all.

I want to go to college and become a vet. Something I dreamed about since I first saw what a vet did. I want to help save animals lives, to give people their animal back when they are at death door.

I want it all.

I want to be the best Mom I can be. I want to watch my little boy grow up into an amazing man and see him succeed on this earth. 

I want it ALL.